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Hilarious Signs!!!!?
Over a gynecologist's office: "Dr. Jones, at your cervix."
On a plumber's truck: "We repair what your husband fixed."
On the trucks of a local plumbing company in NE Pennsylvania: "Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber."
Pizza shop slogan: "7 days without pizza makes one weak."
Outside a muffler shop: "No appointment necessary. We hear you coming."
In a veterinarian's waiting room: "Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!"
Door of a plastic surgeon's office: "We can help you pick your nose!"
On an electrician's truck: "Let us remove your shorts."
In a non-smoking area: "If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action."
On a maternity room door: "Push. Push. Push."
At an optometrist's office: "If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place."
In the front yard of a funeral home: "Drive carefully. We'll wait."
14 Answers
- Anonymous1 decade agoFavourite answer
that's really good!!
a star for u
- Anonymous1 decade ago
Hunky Dory - Ace. A star. Jest 4 Jest so read on. A different leagueM, though, hope u like it.
- Excuses for Not Going to Work -
• I can't come in because I am converting my calendar from Julian to Gregorian.
• If it's all the same to you I won't be coming in to work. The voices told me to clean all the guns today.
• I can't come in to work today because I'll be stalking my previous boss, who fired me for not showing up for work. Ok?
• I just found out that I was switched at birth. Legally, I shouldn't come to work knowing my employee records may now contain false information.
• I set half the clocks in my house ahead an hour and the other half back an hour Saturday and spent 18 hours in some kind of space-time continuum loop, re-living Sunday (right up until the explosion). I was able to exit the loop only by reversing the polarity of the power source exactly, resetting the clocks in the house, while simultaneously rapping my dog on the snout with a rolled up Times. Accordingly, I will be in late, or early.
• The psychiatrist said we had an excellent session. He even gave me this jaw restraint so I won't bite things when I am startled.
• I refuse to travel to my job in the district until there is a commuter tax. I insist on paying my fair share.
• My stigmata's acting up.
• I have a rare case of 48-hour projectile leprosy, but I know we have that deadline to meet...
• I am stuck in the blood pressure machine down at the supermarket.
• Constipation has made me a walking time bomb.
• When I got up this morning I took two Ex-Lax in addition to my Prozac. Now I can't get off the john, but I feel good about it.
• The dog ate my car keys. Now we're going to hitchhike to the vet.
• I'd prefer to remain an enigma.
• I can't come to work today because the EPA has determined that my house is completely surrounded by wetlands and I have to arrange for helicopter transportation.
• I am extremely sensitive to a rise in the interest rates.
• I'm just checking to make sure everything is okay with my not coming in today. I hope you haven't forgotten about our little agreement at last year's Christmas party.
• Yes, I seem to have contracted some attention-deficit disorder and, hey, how about them Skins, huh? So, I won't be able to, yes, can I help you? No, no, I'll be sticking with MCI, but thank you for calling.
- Mark GLv 41 decade ago
Funny stuff!! There is a Korean restaurant in L.A. on Wilshire Blvd. The name is 'Young Dong'
No joke!
- Anonymous1 decade ago
LMAO dat is funny
- Anonymous1 decade ago
Umm from were did you get this stuff.Very well....hahahaha......
- Anonymous1 decade ago
Oh Oh I read these.
Source(s): Your Cusotmized Song Writer, Mike McCracken
