Kaliyug Ka Plato

Based on law of karma life to be enjoying piece by piece with no much damaging to other factors. So in order to maintain a low global warming behavior except when passing wind ( after chana masala), I looking for bicycle that operate on pedal power but occasioional times when my limbs drained of juice looking for a 49 cc motor to pump the pedals to my kothi. Pls help or my grandpa no longer bring me home in his scooter since he say I smell like vomit sometimes, but i swear not.

In an age of globalisation all aspects of the US Presidency should be considered. McCain is a smart man and good for US, since businesses need help because of the economy. SO he wants to keep US wages low and let people buy Chinese goods since that is all they can afford on current wages.

Also, with low taxes he will not make businesses mad lest they flee

offshore and Americans are forced to join the army and face bullets. The man smartly avoids talking about money, instead talking about values so people are passionate enough to vote without hurting businesses. Also, he is good for Arabs since he will sabotage alternative energy before Arab oil is cheap and worthless. He is also good for US since he will stay in Iraq generating employment in US Army and defense factories. He is good for China and Dubai since their investments will be safe and he will borrow more for the war. He is good for India since he will permit outsourcing and will help India bomb Pakistan and give them more nuclear material. SO Americans remain employed and survive on low wages, investments are safe, and the gas is drilled before it falls in value. Moreover it will cost India less to keep Pakistan in check. A WIN/WIN global ticket dont you agree?

C'mon folks, this minnow is a Category 3 compared to Katrina's 5. The Surge is expected to be 14 ft. and not 25 like Katrina's. Is the media in cahoots with the GOP to make the slackers look more responsible this time around. Also, notice how the gas prices did not shoot up 75 cents at the first gust of air after grandma's sneeze. The oil company's fat cats are in a bind with falling demand and knows raising prices will hasten their demise with people buying hybrids and electric cars faster. Also the prices are already so high that even Gustavs surge will not dampen profits. At least the coastal Governors are looking important and McCAin has an opportunity to appear

"Presidential" and "Heroic" with Wundergal Palin in Tow. The height of ironies will be if the storm changes course or is just a whimper and the administration has little room to appear concerned this time around. Wishing the folks the best, and it is my guess this storm will be a pipsqueak with low property damage and a negligible body count. Wanna bet?

I hard ppl gittin kiked out of homes by bank linders and hot dog cost too high. Also the big big car owner begging for money to buy petrol.

Is it true? Then I dont want to come now for studies, Please inform quickly.

In this war of smoke n mirrors who is winnin? Osamaa? He is still in his cave while Dubya will be out soon. The dollar is in quicksand with gas prices in a hot air balloon. US homeowners are living in tents while Bush is giving out free money to prop up the dollar. Even Bear Stearns is in trouble and competing with the panhandlers for a welfare cheque. Trillions have been lost in Wall Street, the US treasury is heommoraging, while Russia is exploding in oil wealth. Has the mullahs in their caves proven US to be a paper tiger built up on hot air pumped by the CIA? The Iraqi spigot is pumping less oil as Condoleeza Rice courts Borat's countrymen for cheap gas. The dollar cost to the US is in trillions while 9/11 cost Osama merely thousands. Are there any winners in this "assymetric" warfare? To whose advantage is the assymetry? Osama, arms dealers, independent contractors, citizens of US .... of the world? Whaddya think O wise ones?

This gal is new and needs it all the time. Mornin noon and night, she wont give up without a fight. Front back and middle, she wont even let me piddle. Now if I knew what I was getting into. Even Spitzer got a better deal. I ODed on Viagra to keep up with the chicken wings and got heart murmurs, until my Niagra stopped gushing and started shooting air. Seems like she might be a little cuckoo too. She likes licking the steak knife and pointing it at me. Should I let her go or introduce her to one of my "best" friends? I am in a dilemma. How about a

sharing arrangement? I aam at a loss and the tip of my pen is sore like a baboon's butt. Any suggestions?

Bubba told me that Dubya wanted his hard working fellas to get a break, what with hoes gettin evicted and foreclosure notices more than they gittin foreplay. So I figgered I would buy some red blooded American goods and trudged off to the nearest box store in my pick-up, when to my chagrin I coulddin find a goddam American product. There were some pinnut butter from Tuskegee, Wine from the good ole folks in LaLa Land, some New Balance shoes assembled in US from foreign sourced insoles. Even the tampons came from Mariachi Islands. Most of the other stuff was from China with the Beijing Olympics logo slapped everywhere. The Fu Mu Shu mascots were on the fly of my underwear to the nipples of my gurls leotard. Some tobacco items from Virginia and Salem were made in US. Now there is so much wine I can drink, and smoke I can puff before falling off balance in the New Balance shoes. Any suggestions on how best to spend Dubya's payout.

My friends suggests gittin some Prime Rib, NY guvnor kind

People in dhabas are talking about how the Chinese sold cheap goods in dollars that were still exorbitantly priced in yuans to the Americans who bought them with money borrowed with credit cards issued by middle eastern debt masters, and now the laborers are out of cash and are even losing homes being not able to pay for their trinkets? Is it true?

God bless Bush for rescuing the poor folks. What is the money for? A vacation in Bahamas or to open a small business (buy a hot dog cart)?

I see no other connection than when the male is on top and pushing his hot dog inside the "underdog"? Any ideas? Or else they would have had a "top burger" and a "under burger",

or a "top pizza" and "down pizza" and so on. There must be a reason why the term "dog" was chosen. By the way, who is it that said "The view never changes if you are not the lead dog".

For people in countries with no snow, this refers to a team of dogs pulling a sled over snow. My O My, what a doggone affair.

What to do? Her dad would not hesitate to pepper me with more holes than Big **** Cheney did to his hunting buddy. The uncle is a crafty opportunist and is in line to inherit some serious moolah if the gal bumps off her dad and is brainwashing her already. My little pepperdine has no mom, and I have been mum so far. I am thinking of warning her dad, but the ungrateful swine is always high on Chivas and chases me out of the room (even the restroom) when we bump into each other (unintentionally). Should I stay quiet and not mess with other peoples lives, since the gal is a nymphomaniac and not even my wife. For all that I know she loves to have me around since I provide her with some good action. Dudes I am confused. The other day at church the sermon was on "doing the right thing". SO guys and gals what would be the right thing to do? Should I call Ratzinger in Vatican and zing him with a zinger? Help me out folks, I will make you some margaritas in heaven served by topless waitresses.

Discrimination based on looks is more efficient since no time is wasted in probing the victim. Discrimination based on caste and religion is stupid since a lot of time is wasted in identifying targets. What do you think?

My boss needs a checklist of excuses to raise gas prices and my raise depends upon the best excuses I can dream up for him to fool the drivers. I am personally interested since I can forward the excuses to David Letterman and end up on his show and maybe quit the clutches of my mealy mouthed, sleazy attired hunched over heap of a Shylock. Without further ado here are some of my favorites.

1. There is a Typhoon approaching the port of Brunei from the Islands of Palau.

2. The Chinese are using up all the gas riding their bicycles constraining suply.

3. The Indians are roasting their tandooris in gas fired grills further jacking up demand.

4. There is salmon clogged in the Alaskan pipeline constricting supply.

5. Hugo Chavez is shipping all his oil to Cuba dousing Castro with gasoline.

6. The Nigerian Rebels have hijacked Shell engineers delaying the discovery of new oilfields.

7. Al Qaida terror cells are looting oil tankers off the Straits of Hormuz.

now ur turn.

Because if the thick is more than long and the long looks like thick then the thick will actually be longer than the long.

Many a saxy lady not talk me when i go them since think i useless bam, but than finding out i having bright future and calling me calling me and not stop. I know many a time i looking hungsome like a Rambo and chasing tham in the bike and car but they so mad. But than when see me in my dads limmosheen next day smile and give me lung distance numbirs over short intritdiksins on pink post it notes. Do they loving me or my dad? Why first no talk to me but then taalk when coming to know i dads businiss brain? One gal even said "You are lucky to have a dad like that or you wwould have been dead."

What she talking bout, she kill me with her sax? Pliss clear this confusion frands.

You know da yang mummas of still yunger gals. They r hotter than a hibachi grill with teriyaki sauce dripping down their g-strings. So when I brake off with the daughter strwabirry puddang pies this mumma call me 2 motel and offer vanilla in manila. Should i now comply?

You know the cutthroat world of real estate development, what with the housing slump taking shape and the bottom feeders in the market getting weeded out, developers are stuck with huge projects with no buyers. Deadlines are crucial, if projects are not completed by a certain deadline, units may not sell, loans may be called, collapsing the whole house of cards (pardon the pun, but it sure aint no fun Monsieur and Madamoiselles).

So this developer in a Western State, lets call him Fats Joe wants Slim Jim's project thrown off the track by holding back progress somehow, so that Fats can complete his units before Slim and swim away with the loot. This is where I come in. Fats is offering me serious dough if I can introduce some endangered species on Slim's site and he will do the rest. Should I do it? What should I charge? I have my eyes on some Red Legged Frogs, Tiger Salamanders, Hooted Owls, the Bald Eagle is a nuisance, pecked me in my one good eye. SO FOLKS, Deal or no Deal? Price??

This host was so full of himself, a total snob. The fella invited us to a party and was'nt even home. The housekeeper and a coterie of servants opened the door and ushered us in. The butlers obviously were instructed to get us drunk in a secluded section of this fella's estate. When we all were full of alcohol and all kinds of roasted meats and cheese, Mr. Bigshot called on a videoscreen saying how sorry he was not to be there personally, then added "but I can see you all are having fun anyways." What does he think, we have nothing better to do than to see his ugly mug on a grainy screen wishing us happy intoxication from some distant locale in Palau or Macau? Man this was the height of being full of oneself. The dweeb even has a personalised toilet with golden handles and a faucet and dryer to wash and dry his hairy behind. Was I within the limits of etiquette to soak this fellas whale bone toothbrush in his own toilet bowl and then place it back in its holder? Any infection?

This is one quirk of nature. DOLLY the cow is only 40 inches in height but pumps out 40 gallons of milk every day. The whole neighborhood likes the creamy milk and there will be a riot if I ever stop delivering the milk to folks, sometimes also taking care of Desperate Housewives as a bonus. The problem is, DOLLY is so short that her nipples almost drag on the ground and she has a special pouch strapped on her haunches that holds her mammaries up, like a bovine push up bra. One of the agri salesman showed up the other day offering to sell high heeled shoes for DOLLY so that I can milk her better. Not a bad idea considering I have to crouch low to milk her and sometimes the fleas from her tail get into my ears. Is it proper etiquette to make a holy cow wear high heeled shoes specially when there are no Bulls nearby to impress. Have you folks heard of such shoes before? What next, lipstick and mascara for DOLLY? Please advise if I should spend the money? Should I raise the milk prices ?

It looks so easy in movies and books. They roll it down and slip it in. But with this fresh tight first timer I keep pushing hard and it flies off at a tangent or she wiggles so bad that the target keeps shifting. I tried top to bottom, bottom to top, sideways, diagonally you name it. Whats going on here? Any tips on how to succeed? What if the bees leave with the honeycomb overflowing?

Man I dont get this chic. Following ya all Yahoo folks advice I reformed myself and went down the honest path telling my Blackberry harem of gals that I was not into commitment but just getting batting practice. Still many suicidal die hards jumped in and I pumped with a clean conscience, until the other day .. I mean night. This gal traversed the whole gamut of the science department from "purely physical" to "somewhat biological" and "immensely chemical". Now she says she is starting to have feelings for me and wants to "know more". Whats more to know, she already knows the length of my enchilada. Is she trying to get me bamboozled? Although this squeeze is surely sweeter than a melon and smoother than silk, my radar is not comfortable and I suspect she will turn in some nasty moves. Should I bail out before she goes psycho? Whats the best way to do it. I didnt mind when all the feelings were confined to a vibrating uterus. But this ... please help .. it was your advice Yahooligans.